Perhaps crime doesn’t pay – but what if you were an elephant? Or a dragon? Or a nightmare creature? In those cases, you may have an entirely different concept of what ‘pay’ means. The Slender Man, I’m guessing, does not take a wage. Dragons are hoarders. Elephants just want to get them some fruit, bark and leaves. For sixteen hours a day. Or else they’ll starve to death.
The point is, Liberty City is a very different place if you’re running over pedestrians as anyone other than a traumatised war veteran – and GTA IV modder indirivacua has a talent for, well, adding psychotic safari animals and mythological creatures to Grand Theft Auto IV. We’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out who Grand Theft Auto V’s protagonist is going to be – but honestly, I’d rather it be farm animal. Seriously. Rockstar? Keep the voice actor. That’s fine. Just let me play as a horse. Let me play out the tragedy of a world-weary horse of action.
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